DAN O’DAY TALKS ABOUT RADIO

This radio commercial goes beyond mere incompetence and enters the realm of Just Plain Bizarre:

The opening line — their one chance to attract the attention of the targeted listener — is:

“How did Dodge become part of the fastest growing auto maker in California?”

Advertising Solves Problems.

No one in the radio audience is grappling with the problem of discovering how Dodge became part of the fastest growing auto maker in California.

No one.

But what the heck are they referring to? What company is is the fastest growing auto maker in California to which they refer?

Dodge-Chrysler?

Or is it Fiat, which acquired Dodge after its bankruptcy a few years ago?

Can the ad agency that created this monstrosity honestly claim this radio advertisement will help the advertiser in any way?

Recently a reporter, interviewing me about radio advertising, asked me for some quick “sidebar” tips on “how to be creative.” Here are three.

These apply apply equally to radio personalities and producers, as well as radio copywriters.

1. Whenever you get even the germ of an idea, write it down. You don’t need to know how you’ll use that idea; you’ll have plenty of time to figure that out later.

But most people won’t bother to put an idea to paper unless they already know exactly how they’ll use it. Big mistake.

2. Don’t try to be creative. Focus on solving a problem. Creativity should not be the goal; it should be the means to an end.

3. When all else fails, go somewhere you’ve never been before. Anywhere, as long as it’s unfamiliar to you.

As you react to new stimuli, you will be forced to think differently…which is a great shortcut to creative solutions.

There’s an old saying in psychology circles:

“If you keep doing what you always do, you’ll keep getting what you always get. So if you want to get something new, do something different.”

That’s more than just a catchy pop psychology mantra. It’s true. If you want today’s journey to be completely different from yesterday’s, all you need to do is begin it from a different place.

This posting isn’t about radio.

But a lot of radio people think they’re funny.

Some of them actually are.

Each year Ken Levine (M*A*S*H, CHEERS, FRASIER, etc.) and I conduct an event for talented, creative people who want to experience what it’s really like to be part of a TV sitcom writing “room.”

The event is called The Sitcom Room.

We’ve just announced the dates, October 26 – 27, but we haven’t yet opened registration (which is limited to just 20 people).

The event always sells out.

If you’d like to be informed the day before we open registration — and thereby get a head start on the rest of the world — make sure you’re on our Sitcom Room Alert List, which you’ll find at the bottom of this page.

It’s a very cool event. Over the years, we’ve even had several radio people attend (including one very funny guy from Austria).

You’ll find all the information here.

The radio commercial:

Traditionally, the percentage of well-written direct response radio advertising has been higher than the percentage of well-written retail or brand advertising.

The level of direct response radio copywriting has sunk so low and so rapidly that it’s almost certainly caused either by the all-pervasive “Let’s just write it ourselves and save money” attitude or the “Why pay what a good copywriter charges when we can get bad copywriting much cheaper?” syndrome.

This spot isn’t just “weak” or “lame.” It’s staggeringly incompetent.

The opening line does its best to drive away listeners:

“One little joint supplement.”

Huh? Whazzat?

Then:

“You know this powerful little pill is great for your joints.”

What powerful little pill? What are you talking about?

The next sentence needs an adjective to place in front of “benefits.”

Hmm, what’s a good adjective? I know! Let’s use the adjective we just used to describe the pill! “Powerful” — that’s a great word! We’re geniuses!

I’d continue to critique this radio advertisement to its conclusion, but I don’t have enough Excedrin handy.

But I’ll point out one last Staggeringly Stupid Strategy:

The goal of this commercial is get people to call for a free 2-week “trial sample” — which no doubt includes shipping & handling and also enrolls the consumer in a “forced continuity program” — to get the “free” two weeks, they have to agree to continue to pay to receive the product forever…or until they cancel.

I’m not criticizing that marketing model. Just keep in mind that the goal of the spot is to get people to call to enter the forced continuity program.

They brag that Instaflex is the “#1 selling joint supplement at GNC.” But hey, forget we just said that, ’cause you can’t get this “free 2-week sample” at GNC.

So why do they mention GNC at all? Uh…Well, y’see, it’s GNC’s #1 selling joint supplement.

Even though you shouldn’t go there for this free offer.

Excuse me, I’ve got to find some cold Diet Coke to wash down my last four  Excedrin tablets.