In honor of Halloween, instead of our usual Monday Radio Commercial Smackdown I’ve decided to share one of the spots features in Secret Case Histories From The Radio Ranch.
Radio legend Dick Orkin pulled back the curtain to reveal behind-the-scenes stories of a number of The Radio Ranch’s many successes — some well-known, others less so.
(That’s Dick on the left, with me on the right, pretending to be interested.)
One great success was for Carlsberg Beer, but only after they figured out how to solve a problem: The ad agency insisted they use the line, “Don’t touch my Carlsberg!”
As Dick explained, it wasn’t easy to find a way to use that line in a manner that didn’t sound overly aggressive. But they managed to overcome that obstacle, as you’ll hear in this spot (featuring Tom Poston along with Dick).
When doing a comedy spot, it’s important to build to a payoff at the end. Notice how this one does just that.
Although this campaign aired in Ireland, the agency specifically wanted to use American voices. Perhaps they figured “American” and “aggressive” go together nicely.
As you might have guessed from the title, this is the fourth in a series of tips for radio talents.
Embrace Emotion
Radio is a hot medium largely peopled by cold performers — jocks who are completely predictable, who don’t care about their listeners, and whose shows rarely are fueled by emotional or creative inspiration.
These people are all attitude and no substance; they strut and shout but don’t really care about anything.
As a result, they don’t achieve a strong connection with their listeners.
As far as I know, Terry Moss’ first entrepreneurial venture was a monthly aircheck service called CAL-ROCK. As a young DJ, I was a subscriber.
His next contribution to radio personalities around the world continues to bring smiles to DJs and listeners alike: The first volume of what became a 5-LP series, Cheap Radio Thrills.
As any old American DJ will confirm, for many years radio stations were required to broadcast periodic tests of the Emergency Broadcast System. Here’s what the listener would hear:
For the next 60 seconds, this station will conduct a test of the Emergency Broadcast System. The following is only a test.
That would be followed by this test tone:
Then the announcer would return to say:
This is a test of the Emergency Broadcast System. The broadcasters of your area in voluntary cooperation with the FCC and federal, state, and local authorities have developed this system to keep you informed in the event of an emergency. If this had been an actual emergency, the Attention Signal you just heard would have been followed by official information, news, or instructions. This station serves the [ ] area. This concludes this test of the Emergency Broadcast System.
Invariably the jock would read that copy in a monotone, there’d be silence, then the test tone, then the jock would return to read the close with the same disinterested inflection.
Terry decided to change all that — with these two cuts from Cheap Radio Thrills. Here’s the introduction:
After the intro, the test tone would be broadcast. Then this cut would be played, complete with a donut for the announcer to read the boilerplate copy that begins, “The broadcasters of your area…”
Question: As a listener, which test would you be more likely to pay attention to? The one delivered in the bored monotone, or the musical version?
Clearly far more people would actually listen to the musical rendition — which really upset the FCC. People actually paying attention to the E.B.S. tests??
So in its infinite wisdom, the FCC decreed that the Emergency Broadcast System test could not be sung.
Bored monotone that no one listens to = Good.
Entertaining version that many people listen to = Bad.
