{"id":18437,"date":"2015-07-27T01:36:22","date_gmt":"2015-07-27T08:36:22","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/danoday.com\/blog\/?p=18437"},"modified":"2015-07-27T10:36:21","modified_gmt":"2015-07-27T17:36:21","slug":"radio-morning-show-host-critic","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/danoday.com\/blog\/2015\/07\/radio-morning-show-host-critic\/","title":{"rendered":"Radio Morning Show Host Spooked by a Critic"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span style=\"color: #000080;\"><strong><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\"><a href=\"http:\/\/danoday.com\/morningsuccess\/ \"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-18441 size-full\" src=\"http:\/\/danoday.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/07\/AngryLetter-mailbox_opened_letter_text_11236-3202.png\" alt=\"Listener criticises radio morining show\" width=\"320\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/danoday.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/07\/AngryLetter-mailbox_opened_letter_text_11236-3202.png 320w, https:\/\/danoday.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/07\/AngryLetter-mailbox_opened_letter_text_11236-3202-300x281.png 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 320px) 100vw, 320px\" \/><\/a>A Loyal Reader Writes:<br \/>\n<\/span><\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n<blockquote><p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">We recently built our morning show on our AC station with me as the &#8220;driver&#8221; and a fairly old female friend of mine. She and I have always razzed each other and have a sarcastic friendship. Although she had some radio experience in another market in promotions, she had never been on the air. The plan was to find someone green and train her, at the same time present her character as experienced and an equal to my character. It would be a challenge, yet I knew she would be perfect based on our sarcastic friendship.\u00a0 \u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">We build the show largely following your <a href=\"http:\/\/danoday.com\/radio-morning-show-success-strategies-mp3\">training<\/a>, in fact we continue to study since we started the show in April.\u00a0 \u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Yesterday my office received the attached letter. No attention to, no name signed, no return address. On my ride home I heard you mention about &#8216;not removing the negatives&#8217; in one of your trainings. I have also heard you several times speak of differing points of view of the characters on the show, and how that would allow different listeners to take the side of different characters.\u00a0 \u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">We are both well aware of our characters on air. We do razz each other often. She will often come across as less confident on some days and mispronounce artist or celebrity names that she really does know. I choose to call it a (Name)-ism based on her last name. Any teasing is not much more harsh than that, on both of our ends.\u00a0 \u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">In your opinion, is the attached letter a sign that our show and characters are working and nothing should change, or could she represent a good majority of the listeners and we should change our ways? \u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">You will read about our intern that started this week. He is new and his character wasn&#8217;t to be a part of the sarcasm. We used his young (17) age to our benefit, since my cohost and I are 44.<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<h2 style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Here Is the Letter the Radio Station Received.<\/span><\/strong><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt; font-family: times new roman,times,serif;\">(Radio Station)<\/span><br \/>\n<span style=\"font-size: 14pt; font-family: times new roman,times,serif;\">(Address)<\/span><br \/>\n<span style=\"font-size: 14pt; font-family: times new roman,times,serif;\">(City, State, Zip)<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt; font-family: times new roman,times,serif;\">re: (Morning Host)<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt; font-family: times new roman,times,serif;\">I listen to (Radio Station) in the morning and just cannot believe how RUDE (Morning Host) is to (Co-Host).<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt; font-family: times new roman,times,serif;\">He obviously is unhappy with her as a co-host; constantly criticizing her every move and always making comments that are just <strong><span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">RUDE<\/span><\/strong>. Most of the show (Morning Host) is just plain condescending; perhaps he was not in favor of a co-host?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt; font-family: times new roman,times,serif;\">I have to say (Co-Host) is a PRO; no matter what rude comment (Morning Host) throws at her she tries so hard to be professional about it. (Morning Host) on the other hand, acts out his comments on the air with a bit of immaturity.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt; font-family: times new roman,times,serif;\">I would venture to say (Morning Host) is purposely trying to make it uncomfortable for (Co-Host) and then she ends up leaving \u2014 or he does not like women, either way his behavior is negative.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt; font-family: times new roman,times,serif;\">This morning, he introduced his intern who is a &#8220;male&#8221; and lo and behold, he was super nice and complimentary. He also seems eager with (News Guy); does (Morning Host) only like men? Or is he just rude?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt; font-family: times new roman,times,serif;\">He speaks often of his daughter\u2026would he appreciate someone like him speaking down to his daughter at some point in her life?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt; font-family: times new roman,times,serif;\">He also mentioned on air that he often gets &#8220;unfriended&#8221; on Facebook and admittedly said it may be because of his personality\u2026well duh, time to get a mirror check (Morning Host)\u2026you are not a nice person\u2026you have a radio voice, but that&#8217;s about it\u2026(Co-Host) has a radio voice, she&#8217;s nice, she&#8217;s funny, she&#8217;s got the whole package and I think you are just not happy that someone who shares your podium is better than you. True? You should ask yourself that question.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt; font-family: times new roman,times,serif;\">This letter is not intended to be mean, it is just wrong what (Morning Host) does every day. He needs a mirror check right away or you will lose your listeners.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt; font-family: times new roman,times,serif;\">Thank you,<\/span><\/p>\n<h2 style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Some General Observations (aka Assumptions) About the Letter<\/span><\/strong><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">It&#8217;s written by a woman. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">The writer is educated, and she&#8217;s intelligent. Clearly she misinterprets (more on that later) your on-air teasing, but she expresses herself clearly and articulately. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">She&#8217;s not a habitual crank letter writer. This is evident from the tone of the letter, the relevance of her examples\u2026and from the fact that she is aware enough to break up her letter into short paragraphs.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Why is &#8220;short paragraphs&#8221; relevant to my analysis of the letter writer? People who write complaint letters as part of their daily life do so out of a blind anger or hurt that renders them oblivious to the recipient&#8217;s experience. It doesn&#8217;t occur to them to stick to 2- and 3-line paragraphs, to maximize the ease with which the recipient can read the letter.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">She&#8217;s writing not because she wants your radio show or your station to be better. She really dislikes you. That&#8217;s a good thing. It&#8217;s easier to convert someone who cares into a fan than someone who couldn&#8217;t care less.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2 style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">What This Letter May Tell Us About Your Radio Program<\/span><\/strong><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">We can safely deduce from this letter that:<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">\u2022 The writer doesn&#8217;t like you.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">\u2022 The writer doesn&#8217;t like your show.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Additionally, one of the following deductions probably is accurate.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\"><strong>1.<\/strong>\u00a0 Her reaction to your morning show isn&#8217;t representative of your target audience. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">She may be outside your target demo. If she&#8217;s 85 (or 15) years old and your target is 35-to-49 year old females, why worry?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">She may be hypersensitive to our culture&#8217;s male-female dynamic.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\"><strong>2.\u00a0<\/strong> Your show isn&#8217;t very good\u2026yet. You said it&#8217;s a new show. Maybe it hasn&#8217;t yet found its rhythm.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\"><strong>3.<\/strong>\u00a0 Your show sucks. Period.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\"><strong>4.\u00a0<\/strong> Because your partner is new to the on-air side of the biz, perhaps she hasn&#8217;t yet learned to react appropriately when you tease her.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Does she just sit there and take it, saying nothing?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Does she get flustered, not knowing what to say?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Does her reaction sound angry?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Or does she react in a way that acknowledges the &#8220;fun-sarcastic&#8221; relationship while at the same time moving the show forward?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\"><strong>5.<\/strong>\u00a0 You and your partner haven&#8217;t yet clicked as a team. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">In radio, the<a href=\"http:\/\/danoday.com\/blog\/2010\/06\/radio-team-tip\/\"> successful team shows<\/a> &#8220;work&#8221; from the very beginning. Either that magical &#8220;I know exactly what she&#8217;s about to say&#8221; connection is there\u2026or it isn&#8217;t.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Still, you said your partner is a beginner, while you&#8217;re an experienced pro. Perhaps she has a little catching up to do before you guys fall into a natural rhythm that reflects your personalities and your relationship while entertaining your audience.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">You said you&#8217;re both well aware of your on-air characters. Have you discussed the roles each of you is there to fill? Have you agreed upon what each of your characters is supposed to bring to the show?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">(Note to the uninitiated: &#8220;Character&#8221; doesn&#8217;t mean &#8220;fake persona.&#8221; Your on-air character is the parts of your personality that you deliberately choose to share with your audience.)<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">You describe your friendship as &#8220;sarcastic.&#8221; Have the two of you had a conversation about how to be sarcastic with each other on-air without coming off as unpleasant people?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Have you structured your program in a manner that allows your sarcasm to be perceived by listeners as good natured, rather than mean spirited?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">When you&#8217;re sarcastic with your partner in real life, she knows you&#8217;re being playful, not nasty. You guys have a long friendship to draw upon. But your listeners aren&#8217;t privy to that long relationship. All they know is what they hear on the radio. What is there in your presentation styles that lets listeners recognize you&#8217;re having fun with each other?<\/span><\/p>\n<h2 style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">You Might Have Misunderstood My View on &#8220;Removing Negatives.&#8221;<\/span><\/strong><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Most radio program directors think if they can just eliminate all the purported &#8220;negatives&#8221; they hear about from listeners, they&#8217;ll improve their ratings.<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">&#8220;They talk too much&#8221; \u2014 PD reacts, &#8220;Don&#8217;t talk longer<br \/>\nthan 7 seconds.&#8221;<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">&#8220;They&#8217;re too silly&#8221; \u2014 PD reacts, &#8220;Cut out any silliness.&#8221;<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\"> &#8220;They&#8217;re not funny&#8221; \u2014 PD reacts, &#8220;No comedy or humor.&#8221;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">What you&#8217;ve heard me say is, &#8220;In radio, you don&#8217;t win by removing negatives. You win by giving people a reason to listen.&#8221;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">You know the program director who jumps on the hotline and screams at the jock because he just heard 2 seconds of dead air? Yes, we should avoid unnecessary dead air. No, making sure there&#8217;s never any dead air on your station will not increase your ratings.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">But replacing a boring radio host with one who is entertaining, provocative, or otherwise engaging may increase your ratings\u2026even if that air personality has exactly the same amount and frequency of dead air as the previous guy.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">That doesn&#8217;t mean negatives, therefore, are good. It simply means that the more compelling the program, the less important &#8220;talking up the vocal&#8221; becomes.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2 style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">An Example of a General Manager Who Thought &#8220;Removing Negatives&#8221; Was the Key<\/span><\/strong><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">This might be the most memorable line I ever heard during my on-air radio career. It requires a little bit of a back story.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">I was a jock in San Francisco.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">I had some sort of temporary foot problem; I have no memory of exactly what the problem was.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">I decided to consult a podiatrist. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">To find a podiatrist, I grabbed the Yellow Pages (remember them?) and turned to the &#8220;Physicians&#8221; section, where all the medical specialities were listed in alphabetical order.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">From anesthesiologists to urologists, they were all there.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Except for podiatrists.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">I double-checked and triple-checked. The &#8220;Physicians&#8221; section of the Yellow Pages did not include &#8220;podiatrists.&#8221;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">So I turned to the &#8220;P&#8221; section of the phone book, and there it was, all by itself: &#8220;Podiatrists.&#8221;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Because the best source of fresh material for my radio show was my daily life, the next day I shared that experience with my listeners.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><em><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">&#8220;How dare the phone company discriminate against podiatrists?? It&#8217;s an outrage\u2026.&#8221;<\/span><\/em><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Finally a listener called in to explain that a podiatrist isn&#8217;t an MD (Doctor of Medicine); a podiatrist is a DPM (Doctor of Podiatric Medicine). Hence, podiatrists aren&#8217;t listed among MDs.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Oh. Huh. I didn&#8217;t know that. Thanks for explaining it.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">The next day I was summoned to the General Manager&#8217;s office. He was livid.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Apparently he had heard from a woman who was engaged to guy who was studying podiatry, and she was deeply offended.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">And the GM of this radio station in a Top 5 market got right in my face, nose to nose, and vigorously wagged a finger as he declared, &#8220;You&#8217;ll never be successful in radio if you go around offending podiatrists!&#8221;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">I can&#8217;t make this stuff up, folks.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2 style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">The Value of Different Points of View<\/span><\/strong><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Yes, each team member should bring to the show a different point of view. That point of view, that perspective, comes from each player&#8217;s own background.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">That doesn&#8217;t necessarily mean they disagree on any particular issue. But their different backgrounds and life experiences cause them to see things at least somewhat differently.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Your being sarcastic toward your partner and her not being sarcastic isn&#8217;t an example of different points of view. It&#8217;s an example of different styles.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2 style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">The Sure-Fire Way for Any Radio Personality to Drive Himself\/Herself Crazy<\/span><\/strong><\/h2>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">&#8220;You can&#8217;t please everybody.&#8221;<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">&#8220;When you try to please everyone, you end up pleasing no one.&#8221;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">You&#8217;ve heard the platitudes.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">You <em>can&#8217;t<\/em> please everyone.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Despite your knowing that you&#8217;re a kind, sensitive, generous, fair-minded soul, some people \u2014 including some listeners \u2014 will dislike you.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Welcome to the world.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">The more visible you become, the more you&#8217;ll hear from people who not only dislike you but also have so little to do in life that they spend inordinate amounts of time telling you and the rest of the world about your nasty, brutish, selfish, bullying ways.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Being attacked by strangers who know nothing about you comes with the territory. If you become publicly successful, it&#8217;s unavoidable.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Being attacked shouldn&#8217;t be your goal. But the greater the degree to which your personality plays a significant part of your success, the more you should expect to polarize your audience.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">With a hugely successful radio show, 25% of of the target audience loves the star. 25% of the target audience hates the star. Fifty per cent enjoy the show but don&#8217;t feel as strongly about it as the people who either love it or hate it.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">When you have a show that nobody loves and nobody hates, what do you have? A low-rated program.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">The polarization of a radio audience shouldn&#8217;t be your goal. But it&#8217;s an unavoidable by-product of doing good radio.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2 style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Is That Angry Letter Really a Problem?<\/span><\/strong><\/h2>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">&#8220;I listen to (Radio Station) in the morning.&#8221;<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">&#8220;He&#8217;s constantly criticizing her every move and always making comments\u2026&#8221;<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">&#8220;No matter what rude comment (Morning Host) throws at her she tries so hard to be professional about it.&#8221;<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">&#8220;He speaks often of his daughter.&#8221;<\/span><\/p>\n<p>\u00a0<span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Do you notice the common thread among her comments?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><em><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">She regularly listens to your morning show.<\/span><\/em><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">So other than her thinking you&#8217;re a jerk, what&#8217;s the problem? <em>She regularly listens to your morning show.<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n<h2 style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Should You Consider Changing Your Show Because of this One Letter?<\/span><\/strong><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Of course not.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Not even if you receive 10 or 100 such letters.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Here&#8217;s one of the things they&#8217;ll never teach you in radio school: <\/span><\/p>\n<p><em><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Truly successful air personalities stubbornly go by their instincts.<\/span><\/em><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">They listen to criticism. They welcome suggestions.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">But ultimately it&#8217;s their gut instinct that delivers them to the promised land of radio stardom.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Right now, you&#8217;re following your instincts and you have only one complaining listener to suggest those instincts are wrong.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2 style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">How Can You Turn This Personal Attack into a Positive?<\/span><\/strong><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Unfortunately, the letter was sent anonymously, so you can&#8217;t take the one action that&#8217;s virtually guaranteed to convert her from an angry critic into a fan:<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Call her on the phone. Not as part of your show. Call her after your shift is over. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Thank her for taking the time to share her views with you. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Tell her you&#8217;re very sorry if the way you talk to your partner offends her, especially because you hold your partner in such high regard.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Explain that the two of you have known each other for many years, and that style of sarcastic teasing is the way each of you shows affection for the other.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">You realize that people who aren&#8217;t aware of that strong bond of friendship might, understandably, misinterpret affectionate playfulness as mean spiritedness.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Invite her to come to the station one morning next week, to be your special behind-the-scenes guest. She can meet your partner, she can see how the show is put together, and you&#8217;re pretty sure you can score some Morning Show Java Jugs from the prize closet for her to take home with her.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Regardless of whether she accepts your invitation, your phone call will turn her around. There&#8217;s a good chance she&#8217;ll become one of your most loyal fans.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\"><strong>Note<\/strong> that I don&#8217;t recommend this response to vitriolic letters from crazed, hate filled, emotionally unstable individuals. When you get hate mail from a hater, the best way for you to respond is:<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Not at all. <\/span><\/p>\n<h2 style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">But You Can&#8217;t Call Her, Because She&#8217;s Anonymous.<\/span><\/strong><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Not knowing her identity, you can&#8217;t contact her to initiate a dialogue.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Still, you can communicate with her within the one arena you know she frequents: your show.<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">YOUR PARTNER: What&#8217;s the matter? You seem kind of down this morning.<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">YOU: Hmm? Oh, well\u2026Our station manager received an angry letter from someone who thinks I resent you\u2026and that maybe I resent women in general.<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">YOUR PARTNER: What??<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">YOU: She thinks I&#8217;m very condescending toward you and that maybe I don&#8217;t want you to be on the show and I&#8217;m trying to make you feel uncomfortable.<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">YOUR PARTNER: But\u2026It was your idea to have me as your partner on the Radio X Morning Show. I had never been on the air before, and you went to bat for me with the station management. I love doing this show with you!<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">YOU: (unsurely) I don&#8217;t know\u2026.<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">YOUR PARTNER: Can I see the letter? I&#8217;d like to see what she actually said.<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">YOU: Well, okay\u2026<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Your partner reads the letter aloud, reacting with ever increasing surprise.<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">She defends you.<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">She sings your praises.<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">She does <em>not<\/em> attack or try to embarrass the person who wrote the letter. But by golly, this person has got you so <em>wrong\u2026!<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">YOU: So\u2026It doesn&#8217;t feel like I&#8217;m being mean to you? I mean, maybe it&#8217;s some sort of passive-aggressive behavior on my part, pretending to be joking when in fact I&#8217;m \u2014<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">YOUR PARTNER: No! God knows you have many, many flaws\u2026 But passive-aggressiveness isn&#8217;t among them. <\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">YOU: Well, in that case\u2026.<em>(Funny insult goes here)<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">YOUR PARTNER: Hey!<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 30px;\"><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">YOU: Too soon?<\/span><\/p>\n<h2 style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">This Was One of My Secret Weapons as a Radio Personality.<\/span><\/strong><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Occasionally someone would call me up during my show and verbally attack me because I mispronounced a word or made a joke the caller didn&#8217;t find funny.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">When the caller really was reacting way out of proportion to my supposed infraction, I&#8217;d put that person on the air and let them rant and vent and attack until they ran out of steam.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Then I&#8217;d say, &#8220;I&#8217;m really sorry you feel that way, but I appreciate your calling to let me know.&#8221;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">What do you think would dominate the rest of my show (or, at least, the rest of that hour)?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Unasked, unbidden, the 25% of my audience who loved me would flood the phone lines, leaping to my defense and attacking my over-the-top critic.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">One after another, callers would lambast that critic. <em>&#8220;No sense of humor\u2026&#8221; &#8220;Can&#8217;t take a joke\u2026&#8221; &#8220;Sounds like she has emotional problems\u2026&#8221;<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">And I?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">I&#8217;d respond, &#8220;Well, wait; she&#8217;s entitled to her opinion. I mean, I was just making a joke, but if she really was offended by it\u2026Well, she&#8217;s entitled to her opinion.&#8221;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">And yet\u2026<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Somehow I always let those listeners who called in rant &amp; rave against my critic as much as they wanted. It was only when they finished that I&#8217;d give my tolerant response and tepid defense of the original caller&#8217;s right to her opinion.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\">Funny how it always worked out that way.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>A Loyal Reader Writes: We recently built our morning show on our AC station with me as the &#8220;driver&#8221; and a fairly old female friend of mine. She and I have always razzed each other and have a sarcastic friendship. Although she had some radio experience in another market in promotions, she had never been [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":22,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-18437","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","6":"category-uncategorized"},"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Radio Morning Show Host Spooked by a Critic<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Most radio program directors think if they can just eliminate all the purported &quot;negatives&quot; they hear about from listeners, they&#039;ll improve their ratings...\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" 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