DAN O’DAY TALKS ABOUT RADIO

It was 2007.

Everyone was excited about the extra special guest speaker for my annual International Radio Creative & Production Summit:

Don LaFontaine.

Just a few days prior to the Summit, the phone rang.

It was Don, and as soon as I heard his voice I knew there was a problem.

His chagrin and regret were palpable, as he explained that he wasn’t going to be able to be at the Summit after all. It was obvious that Don felt terrible at having to bail out on such short notice.

He apologized repeatedly and profusely.

Finally I said, “Don, trust me: If I could find a way to spin this situation so that I could get mad at you, I would. But I can’t figure out any way to blame you for this, so don’t worry about it.”

Here’s Don himself, explaining to the attendees why he wouldn’t be there with him.

A couple of days ago I challenged radio copywriters to rewrite one surprisingly weak line in an otherwise good print ad for Trader Joe’s.

The line to be rewritten is the second of these two sentences:

“Trader Joe’s Sublime Ice Cream Sandwiches came to fruition after months and months of tasting and re-tasting by our panel. (Yes, it’s a messy job, but we’re pretty sure we’re up to the task.)”

Here’s the original explanation of the copywriting contest.

Here are the finalists.

If yours isn’t among them, it’s only because of an outrageous oversight by the judging committee.

Or, possibly, because as good as yours was, it didn’t quite follow the required format.

Instructions: Circle Your Favorite.

No, Wait. Enter the Entry Number of Your Favorite in the “Comments” Field Below.

After going through the motions of pretending to consider the feedback of others, our panel will render a final judgment.

Here’s a quick and easy way to improve your radio commercial copywriting.

1. Write a draft of your spot.

2. Look for a line that listeners will react to by thinking, “Oh, I know what they’re going to say next.” Often, the line of copy in question will be a cliché.

3. Replace the cliché with something new and fresh.

Voila!

You surprise your audience.

You please your audience…by surprising them, which they enjoy.

You now have their attention more keenly for whatever you’re going to say next.

Here’s an Example from a Supermarket Print Ad.

I have written before in praise of the copywriting for Trader Joe’s print advertising.

I’ve also written a bit more critically of at least one of Trader Joe’s radio ads.

Their flyers usually are a pleasure to read. They combine the brand’s personality with strong sales pitches for the individual products they feature…without sound “sales-y.”

Recently they fell a little short in their otherwise excellent pitch for their “Sublime Ice Cream Sandwiches.”

“Trader Joe’s Sublime Ice Cream Sandwiches came to fruition after months and months of tasting and re-tasting by our panel. (Yes, it’s a messy job, but we’re pretty sure we’re up to the task.)”

They completed the first part of the technique I’m recommending to you: They avoided the painfully obvious, “It’s a dirty job, but somebody’s got to do it.”

By not delivering the cliché listeners were expecting, they surprised the audience.

On the other hand, “it’s a messy job, but we’re pretty sure we’re up to the task” just isn’t good enough.

It doesn’t even make sense. Because the months of tasting and retesting are in the past, whether or not they’re “up to” the “messy job” can’t be an issue. (Even if we knew what the heck that means….)

I’ll guess the writer was way past deadline and had to finish the darn thing. “Nobody will notice,” s/he probably thought.

Obviously, s/he doesn’t know me very well. Of course I noticed.

So Here’s My Copywriting Challenge to You.

1. Come up with your own, better replacement for the cliché they diligently did avoid.

2. Assume this will be presented as a radio commercial. So write something that can be delivered orally.

3. Submit your rewrite in the “Comments” field below.

The winning submission will be determined by a completely arbitrary, inexplicable process.

The winner will win bragging rights. (Of course, if you do win you’ll need to come down to the station to pick up your prize.)

So, whatcha got?

Does this sound familiar?

Your radio advertising client has provided you with a bunch of bullet points. All you need to do is speak them into a microphone:

• The retailer has the widest selection in the county.

• They have the best prices in town.

• They have lots of free parking.

• Every staff member has been to a special school that taught them how to make sure the customer buys exactly the right item and never makes a purchasing mistake.

• They accept major credit cards.

• They’re open seven days a week.

• They’ve been voted the county’s #1 Whatsis dealer three years in a row.

Here’s Someone Talking About the Craft of an Actor.

 

“As soon as some details are removed, those which remain will have greater emphasis, merely because there are no other details competing for the attention of the audience.”
  — F. Cowles Strickland, THE TECHNIQUE OF ACTING

In That List of Commercial Bullet Points, What if We Removed…

• Widest selection

• Good prices

• Free parking

• Major credit cards

• #1 dealership

We would be left with one detail upon which to build the entire spot.

And if we created a good enough radio commercial, that one detail would stand out, be heard, and be remembered.