
July, 1996:
The month started with me in London, England, for the second European PD Grad School. A few days later I was in Cleveland to speak at McVay Media’s Programmers’ School.
It was while preparing to check out of the hotel in Cleveland that I became consciously aware of the tendency of certain people to refuse to answer direct questions — choosing instead to answer questions they weren’t asked.
Case in point: I knew I wanted to arrive at the airport no later than 5:00PM. So I asked the hotel’s concierge, “If I want to arrive at the airport not later than 5:00, what time do I need to leave the hotel?”
“What time does your flight leave?” she replied.
In courtroom terms, that was a non-responsive answer.
By the way, the hotel concierge should be the most knowledgeable, most resourceful person in the building. In certain American hotels, however, the “concierge” is an entry-level position filled by the lowest-paid, least experienced person available.
The hotel in Cleveland was one of those hotels.
“No, listen: All I want to know is when I have to leave this hotel if I want to reach the airport by 5:00.”
A desk clerk overheard this and interrupted, with great assurance: “What time does your flight leave, sir?”
“No, no, no! It doesn’t matter when my flight leaves! All I want to know is when I have to leave this hotel if I want to reach the airport by 5:00.”
The front desk manager appeared. “May I help you, sir?”
“I hope so,” I sighed. “I’ll be taking a taxi from this hotel to the airport later this afternoon, and I’m trying to find out when I should leave the hotel if I want to arrive at the airport by 5:00.”
“Ah, I see,” he purred. “And what time does your flight leave?”
“That’s none of your business! That’s completely irrelevant to my question! Maybe I want to reach the airport 15 minutes before my flight. Maybe I have to take care of some ticketing and want to get there 90 minute early. Maybe I have a meeting scheduled there two hours before my flight. Maybe I just want to hang out at the airport and watch the planes take off! Just tell me how long it takes to get to the airport late this afternoon!”