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Hey, guess what? Mr. & Mrs. Stupid have a child!

radio commercials

First, the commercial.

Golly, you’ve never heard that commercial before, have you?

A compelling story, with real-life characters we truly care about. How could it be any better?

Why do Mr. & Mrs. Stupid always have a Precocious Child?

How does the Precocious Child know everything about HD Radio?

In what universe does a parent’s voice sound that way when directed at a child? (Hint: They’re probably not speaking from the same height, nor with equal degrees of interest and/or urgency.)

In what world do parents and children converse without either one ever interrupting the other? In the Stupid family, each person waits for the other to complete not only a sentence but the entire thought before speaking.

You Never, Ever Will Hear A Child Say: “Dad, how come we don’t have an HD radio?”

You Might — Not Really, But Theoretically It’s Possible — Hear A Child Say: “Dad, can we get an HD radio?”

Any parents reading this who can back me up on that? Anyone? Anyone?

Why is Mr. Stupid the only person in the world who thinks HD radio users are required to pay a monthly bill?

Why does his Precocious Child know otherwise?

Why does this Precocious Child know that “cable TV” and “high speed Internet” cost money, when all his peers just take those communication channels for granted? (If you have a child under the age of 10, you know what I mean.)

Why does Mr. Stupid ask his Precocious Child if HD radios are expensive?

How does the Precocious Child know HD radios cost as little as $50?

How many children offer their parents investment advice?

How many parents ask their children for stock tips?

How many listeners can relate to this father/child conversation?

Where’s the anti-nausea medication?

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CURSE OF THE VETERAN RADIO DJ

Illustration © 2010 by Bobby Ocean

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FOUR KEYS TO SUCCESSFUL ON-AIR RADIO CONTESTS (Video)

radio promotionsWarning: This video does include a plug for my e-book.

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November (1995) (continued): The Barcelona hotel the NAB chose was quite nice, with a spectacular location on the waterfront. (Randi Reiten and Lucy Smith have very good taste.)

On Tuesday I took a brief walk outside. On one side of the hotel was a Hard Rock (“Tarda Rock”) Cafe. On the other side was a Planet Hollywood. Sure was glad to escape superficial Los Angeles for sophisticated Europe.

I went back inside the hotel to escape.

Although I finished the last of my seminars on Tuesday afternoon, my flight back home wouldn’t leave until Wednesday. So early Tuesday evening I went for a walk along the pier near my hotel, looking for a good place to eat.

As I strolled along the pier, I glanced to my left and was stunned to see the most beautiful night’s moon I have ever witnessed: a deep blue sky over blue water, and perhaps 30° over the water a huge, burnt-orange moon. Absolutely spectacular.

Barcelona restaurants typically do not begin serving dinner until 9 o’clock or later; most of the restaurants were closed.

radio programming spain

Pans & Company

I ended up eating at Pans & Company, a chain of sandwich-style take-out restaurants. (In fact, after the previous night’s foodless reception, I slipped out of the palace and walked 100 yards or so to another Pans & Company to assuage my hunger.)

Pans & Company features a variety of sandwiches made with fresh baguettes, quite good, inexpensive. I bought my sandwich and drink and sat at one of the hundreds of little outdoor tables.

As I began to eat, five cats approached me and sat on the ground next to my chair. One was black-and-white; the other four (including two kittens) were pitch-black. All of them meowed throughout my meal, pleading for food.

radio stations spain

Cute kittens. You happy now?

In fact, one of the kittens jumped up onto my tiny table to inspect my dinner more closely. A moment later he was joined by the other kitten and one of the adults. All meowing plaintively.

radio commercials spain

Yet another cute kitten. With a hobby.

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VOICEOVER WEBSITES: THE JURY IS IN

voice actors websites

I don’t know if you heard, but I’m told a couple of people attacked me on some voiceover forum:

“What the hell does HE know about websites?”

“Have you seen HIS website? My kid could make a better site than that!”

Here’s what provoked their attack:

WEBSITES FOR VOICE ACTORS: Why Your Website Isn’t “Working” for You And How And Why You Need To Fix It Immediately

A live, 2.5-hour teleseminar I conducted Wednesday night.

I’ve created this posting for attendees to share their own reactions to the teleseminar.

Just in case you missed it and the reviews sound good to you, I’ve made it available for download…for just a few days.

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