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WHEN PEOPLE IN RADIO SAY THIS, THEY MEAN THAT: THE SEQUEL

Here are five more translations of what radio people really mean.

“How was your weekend?” — Prefix to a Monday morning request for help, urgently needed due to intense procrastination on the part of the person doing the asking.

Listener — One who stops by to pick up a prize that is nowhere to be found and about which no one knows anything.

No Charge Spot — A radio commercial heard by no one, as compensation for its having been heard by no one earlier.

Payday — A momentary biweekly illusion that one is not financially doomed.

Parade — Something in which one would dearly love to drive the station vehicle, if only one’s spouse had not already made plans that cannot be changed, much to one’s regret.