Nancy Tyler emailed me this question:
How can I make character dialogue sound like natural conversation while still delivering the key copy points?
Hopefully those key copy points all focus on how the consumer’s life will be better if they avail themselves of the product or service the advertiser is offering. So just SAY it in the language THEY would use —you know, real people’s language.
It’s the difference between:
“How can one utilize commonly used linguistic patterns with a high degree of cultural resonance while simultaneously incorporating the manufacturer-to-producer transfer of benefits?”
and
“How can I make character dialogue sound like natural conversation while still delivering the key copy points?
A radio commercial is a conversation with the consumer. So speak conversationally. Use language they recognize, the same language that they use.
No real people say “storewide sale” or “friendly, knowledgable staff” or “family owned & operated” or “conveniently located”; why in the world would you speak to your prospects in a language that is foreign to them?
And by the way, they’re not key copy points if the targeted listener doesn’t care about them.
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When I teach writing for radio, whether that’s for music radio or for commercials I always stress this. I point out that radio isn’t like writing an essay or piece for a magazine; as the rules of grammar generally don’t apply here. But I also suggest it’s like any piece of sales technique. A good salesperson will tune-in to the person they’re trying to sell to, they mirror, they think about what this person will want and sell them those points (sometimes ignoring the rest) a radio ad or a link trailling ahead to the new Britney song is no different to that. In this regard I suggest it’s a lot like flirting.
I have always told copywriters and producers that ANY conversational ad was a sign of an A.E. who didn’t care enough to find out more details about the client – bullet points presented in a conversational ad – even more so.
So Dan’s comments about using the appropriate language that the customers recognize is paramount if you even are considering a conversational ad. Personally I ALWAYS try to get the ad re-written.
But in saying that – I have only ever heard 2 ad’s written in a conversational style that worked – why they worked was because they were targeted at a specific audience who knew the language of the client (yes it was a cinema chain – and it was full of movie cliche’s that most people know – but who really knows what a Gaffer is – let alone what they do) – the ad’s worked brilliantly increasing store traffic.
I also agree with RICH’s comment – a conversational ad has to be just like flirting – tease the customer with information that makes them want to know more – therefore calling them to action – while trying to get the clients needs across is a fine balancing act – get it right and it will pay off – get it wrong and conversational ads will make people switch off.
Maybe it’s just me – but whenever I hear a conversational ad – I jump stations.
Hows that for timing – I just posted the previous comment and an ad from an AGENCY comes across my desk – read extremely poorly and stilted – this is a transcription of the 30 second spot – a classic example of what not to do in a conversational ad …
MVO: So it turns out he was going to measure (pause) from the inside edge (pause) and he was going to cut the batton 5 mil short!
FVO: And you got this (pause) just from talking to him?
MVO: Well it’s the third time he has come in for the gear for that job (pause) I had a pretty good idea what he was up to (pause) I just asked him a few questions
FVO: You love it (pause) don’t you!
MVO: What?
FVO: Doing the whole (HARDWARE STORE) man thing!
MVO: You mean helping people with their DIY projects?
FVO: Yacking about hardware (pause) all day!
MVO: And saving people money (pause) of course I love it (pause) its (HARDWARE STORE)
FVO: Yeah (pause) I know (pause) best job in the world.
The ad has the worst music bed under it that I have ever heard (can you hear me back there in the 80’s!) not to mention that the voice talent is so bored it is coming across in their read.
The store itself is part of a national chain – so they obviously feel they don’t need to tell you were they even are – this ad simply sucks airtime and treats the customers like idiots.
Actually, I like conversational spots. The secret, and I think it was Dick Orkin who said it, is to start in the middle of the conversation. It gives the characters a life before this little 60 second snapshot that you are privvy to and makes them more believeable. That doesn’t make them any easier to write, however. The Chuck Blore AT&T long distance spots are classic and should be required listening for any aspiring copywriter. Even tho they are 25 years or so, they can still give me goosebumps.